Which activity most directly nurtures the sense of fondness and admiration?

• A. Avoiding compliments to reduce dependency.
• B. Regularly expressing appreciation, recalling positive memories, acknowledging strengths, and journaling moments of admiration.
• C. Focusing only on problem solving.
• D. Journaling negatives about the partner.

Answer: (B)

Fostering fondness and admiration comes from actively highlighting and savoring your partner’s positive qualities. Regularly expressing appreciation, recalling positive memories, acknowledging strengths, and journaling moments of admiration keeps the focus on what is good about them, which strengthens warm, affectionate feelings. This practice creates a positive cycle: you notice and name the good, you remember why you’re drawn to them, and you build a reservoir of goodwill to draw on during conflicts. In Gottman terms, this directly nurtures the fondness and admiration that underpin a healthy relationship and helps protect warmth when tensions arise. The other options pull attention away from positive regard—avoiding compliments dampens warmth, focusing only on problem solving neglects positive connection, and journaling negatives about the partner erodes respect and admiration.